Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Hacker site review.

 I went into the Hacker website thinking all the exercises would be easy, and they were not. They gave me a reminder of what keeps writing parallel. As in the example: A  tsunami hit a populated coast in Papua New Guinea, killing two thousand people and wiping out whole towns. This sentence was correct because the –ing forms killing and wiping are parallel. Another exercise that was helpful was what words are needed in sentence and what is not. For example: The man whom we encountered at the airport turned out to be a long lost friend, the word ‘whom’ can be omitted without causing problems for the reader.  Sometimes I use unnecessary words when they are not needed. Another helpful review during the exercises was the about shifts in verb tense. A person should not be changing tenses every few words in a sentence. In the sentence: Rowling, who is now one of the richest people in England, has the ability to make readers of any age remember their awkward preteen years. This sentence is correct because the verbs is and has are both present tense. Overall the Hacker website was very helpful, and I will use the knowledge I know to improve my writing.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Hacker Review of Clear Sentences.

E-ex 8-1 Active vs. passive verbs: This exercise was very helpful, because I do not always understand the difference between what is happening and what has happened. 


E-ex 8-2 Active vs. be verbs: This was not very helpful. I did very well in this exercise, and realized the difference in how strong or weak writing or making a statement/question can be.


E-ex 8-3 Active verbs  (edit and compare): This exercise was helpful, it helped me get a review of how to make strong sentences, and take away extra words or information that are unnecessary.


E-ex 9-1 Parallelism: Although I knew about this exercise well, it was still helpful because it was a good reminder to use the same endings, such as -ing, -es, or -ed. 


E-ex 9-2 Parallelism: This exercise was not very helpful because I knew already about parallelism and what is acceptable and what is not.


E-ex 9-3 Parallelism  (edit and compare): This exercise was not helpful, I had almost all the same answers as the possible revisions. It did make me think though about how my sentences needed to be and was a good review.


E-ex 10-1 Needed words: This exercise was helpful and reminded me of words that may be unnecessary in writing.

E-ex 10-2 Needed words  (edit and compare): This exercise was helpful because my revisions were not always like what the revisions the program had. I did learn about more ways to make a sentence more complete.

E-ex 11-1 Mixed constructions: This exercise was helpful because it made me realize what was a better sentence word choice than some I may have used otherwise, such as how to start a definition properly.

E-ex 11-2 Mixed constructions  (edit and compare): This exercise was helpful because I had a hard time distinguishing between using words that are appropriate for a sentence and other that are not correct, such as starting a sentence with "by".

E-ex 12-1 Misplaced modifiers: This exercise was not helpful because I knew that certain words need to be close to what it is modifying. 

E-ex 12-2 Misplaced modifiers  (edit and compare): This exercise was helpful because it showed me how to make sentences clearer.
E-ex 12-3 Dangling modifiers: This exercise was not helpful because I already knew that the subject should be named right away.

E-ex 12-4 Dangling modifiers  (edit and compare): This exercise tricked me, and was very helpful. Even when I thought the sentence was not right, it was and only needed little revising, where as I thought  it needed a lot.

E-ex 13-1 Shifts: person and number: This exercise was not helpful because I already knew that the subject needs to only be singular or plural throughout the sentence. 

E-ex 13-2 Shifts: tense: This exercise was not helpful because I understand that the tenses or words cannot change in a sentence. They need to be the same.  

E-ex 13-3 Shifts: This exercise was not helpful, I already knew that the tense needs to be the same, and the voice needs to be either direct or indirect. A person should not ever use the word "you" either. 

E-ex 13-4 Shifts  (edit and compare): This exercise was helpful because a few times I had my words mixed up and not how they should have been. I noticed again that using the word "you" is incorrect. 

E-ex 14-1 Choppy sentences: This exercise was helpful because I had a review of dangling modifiers and also when and where to add commas. 

E-ex 14-2 Choppy sentences  (edit and compare): This exercise was helpful because I learned how to combine similar topics and make the sentence run smoother. 

E-ex 14-3 Subordination: This exercise was helpful, because I didn't understand that when a writer adds "which" it takes away the emphasis on the next information.

What makes a story good, our class list.

As a class we made groups and talked about what we thought would make a story good. We presented in class about what our findings were, and from that we all regrouped and decided what our top 2 findings were in our own groups. 
We had to place them on a spreadsheet, and this was our findings for our whole class. I prioritized them into what I thought was most to least important:


--Grammar and Structure
-- Introduction: Needs to catch your attention and make you want to keep reading to find out what happens.
-- When it is made for the reader to understand. Target audience.
--Pace: How fast the story moves shouldn't be to fast or to slow.
--Be logical: a story should make sense.
--Emotion: The ability to connect to the emotions of what is happening.
--Creative: Should be something new that makes story more interested and different.
--Imagination: Being creative makes it more interesting to read, and more engaging.
--Using good resources to find legit information.
--Good choice of words but has to make sense.
--Conclusion that summarizes main points of the story.
--Has a good hook in the beginning.
--Creative body could make readers not loose their interests in your story.
--Transition from one point to another.
--Clear and interesting ending.
--Attractive clues that makes you want to read more.
--Put facts from least to most important. 
--Mystery: don't make the topic be extremely obvious. allow the reader to actually think about it and try to figure things out for themselves.
--Personalized stories with your own words and ideas are more meaningful and interesting.







Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Bedford Handbook

13-1 Shifts: Person and Number
Using pronouns, (such as we, are, they, them, us) the writer needs to stay within the same point of view. Keep the sentence singular or plural.


Examples:

Every year I go to the beach, and they find a new species!

This is not correct, the writer should have said,
Every year I go to the beach, and I find a new species!
----------------------------------------------------------------
My rabbit loves to eat, but they don't like carrots.

This is not correct, the writer should have said,
My rabbit loves to eat, but he doesn't like carrots.
----------------------------------------------------------------
When babies have hunger, it cries a lot.

This is not correct, the writer should have said,
When babies have hunger, they cry a lot.



Never use "you" to describe anyone in general.

Example:

When we drove through the city, you began see lots of homeless people.

This is not correct, the writer should have said,
When we drove through the city, we began to see lots of homeless people.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Story Reviews


Story-in-a-box: class reviews

Story-in-a-box: top three

Comma Usage


The topic I decided to study is comma usage. Many people do not know how to use them properly, and I do not always understand, either. I have found a few simple guidelines that make knowing when to use commas a little bit simpler. If a person has a base knowledge, using commas becomes second nature, and a person will understand how we use them in our daily life.

· Commas are used to separate two independent clauses and are placed before a coordinating conjunction such as but, nor, so, and yet.
Example:
I love going to the library, but I never check out any books.

Commas are used after any introductory words, phrase, or clause. Commas can also be used to tie in any words that are not necessary for the sentence.
Example:
In fact, most books at the library are free, however, I still do not check them out.

Commas are needed in a series of items, and before any quotations.
Example:
My father said that I needed books, pens, and pencils. He made sure to tell me, “if you forget anything we are not coming back!”

Commas are also used in dates, titles, and places.
Examples:
Today is January 21, 2012.
Our family is in Sauk Rapids, Minnesota.
Today I received a letter of recommendation from the hospital; it is from Samuel Adams, Ph.D.




Cogdill, Sharon, and Judith Kilborn. "LEO Comma Rules." Welcome to LEO: Literacy Education Online. Write Place. Web. 23 Jan. 2012. <http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/punct/comma.html>.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

When is a story "good?"

When is a story “good?”
1.       When it is made for the reader to understand. Target audience.
2.       Pictures to help explain the situation or storyline.
3.       Based on a life experience.
4.       Examples or details to back up what the topic is about.
5.       Rich imagination. Extensive details.
6.       Easy for the reader to follow.
7.       Unexpected ending.
8.       Using good resources to find legit information.
9.       Bring reader into the story or article.
10.   Keeps the reader’s attention.
11.   Has a good hook in the beginning.
Parameters: Make sure to stay on topic. Only write about what you know about.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Story In A Box Assignment

This story is about how items can be much more than just what is for decoration. Many have stories or memories that follow them where ever they may go. Also, how simple an object may be, but yet it means the world to someone. What may be garbage to a person, could be a treasure to another.

Assignment #1
Story-in-a-box
Memories

One day my grandmother called us. She said that my grandfather was being transferred to Safe Haven, a nursing home in our town. It was decided we would go to help make his transition easier, and I would help him set up his room.
When we arrived at Safe Haven, I was excited to see my grandfather! After talking for a while, we were shown to his room. The Care Cab driver brought in a small brown box and my grandpa then picked it up and asked me if I’d like to help him set his items up in his room.
There were 12 items, each told a different story or had a different meaning. Every time I was able to come to his old house, I loved hearing about each one. The first was a canoe that he had handmade when he was a little boy with his father. His father decided to teach him how to make items that he could always sell in the future. The canoe was made out of wood shavings, was fairly small, and had ties that were of leather. It was fairly durable, so I set it next to a lamp near his bed. After that, he decided to make more items out of wood. One of his most prized possessions was an image of a friend’s head. She had blue eyes, red lips, and her name was Valburga. The head looked exactly like her. I placed it next to the canoe, and then continued digging in the box. The next item I felt was soft and I knew exactly what it was, a piece of cloth that he had bought for my grandmother when they bought their first house together. It had a very detailed flower design, and matched one of her favorite pictures. I set it in the middle of one of the tables in his new room for everyone to see.
My mother pulled out the next two items, which were figurines. One was a dark lady who had a very young face; my grandfather said it reminded him of a school teacher he once had. The other figurine was a man with a drum and a scarf, my grandfather loved music, drums being his favorite. I placed these two items in the middle of the cloth and strategically placed 3 chestnuts that my grandfather was holding in his hands to be put somewhere. They were his favorite to eat.  Finally, I picked out my favorite item, a hand blown glass jar that is green in color. It was from a woman who just had a baby and was selling the jars to make money. He felt sorry for her, and gave her triple the price. He always had a heart for kids.
My grandmother then gave my grandfather a stamp that was made out of jade and asked if he remembered it. He had used it when he wrote her letters from when he was drafted into World War 2. It had very intricate designs at the top; I loved to look at it. I set it on the end table and moved on. One of the prettiest items my grandfather had was this Spanish farm called a Finka, it was made out of clay and I always imagined how living at one would be. The Finka was detailed with a garage, chimney, pebble stones that made up the driveway, and trees in the front. I set it next to the canoe. Next I pulled out a ruler that he used to make a wallet out of leather. My grandfather said he worked hard on the elephant detailing on the front, and he made it to keep the coins he had received by a friend in a currency holder. The holder was blue and he needed a more durable case. I set the wallet in his lap along with the currency; I didn’t want to misplace them. I was saddened when we were done setting up the room, and I cannot wait to go back and see him and hear his stories about each of his treasured items.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Story In a Box Inventory


1.       Canoe:  Made of wood shavings put together, it appears handmade. It had ties around the sides made by felt material.
2.       Chestnuts: There are 3, of different sizes, not perfectly symmetric. They are hard, and of a dark brown color, have a few light spots.
3.       Stamp: Bottom is a red color, made of jade, is a green-blue color.  Looks carefully carved at the top to make an intricate design with many details.
4.       Glass Jar: Different shades of green that go in different not perfect lines. The bottom is clear so you can see to the top, has a small cork that plugs the top too.
5.       Finka- Is a Spanish farm that is detailed with a garage, top area to walk onto then go down stairs. Has a tree in the front along with a chimney, has pebble stone for the driveway.
6.       Wallet: Made of a leather material, has an elephant on the front in red with a creature on its back. It snaps close, and the inside has pockets made from a material used to make moccasins.
7.       Currency Holder: Different sizes of the money, the coins are silver and one is copper. They are laminated and had a blue cover.
8.      Wood Carving (head): Has blue eyes, red lips, is about half a foot tall. Face is said to look exactly like Valburga.
9.       Figurine: Skinny legs, tall and about 1.5 ft. tall. It is a black woman and has a young face.
10.   Cloth: About 2 ft. long, has many colors, 200 years old. Has a very detailed flower-like design all over it, and it looked soft.
11.   Runner Figurine: About 1 ft. tall, running with a drum. Has a green type hat and scarf that looks like it is flowing in the wind.
12.   Ruler: Wooden, 1 ft. long, yellow, smooth, used for measuring. It has centimeters, millimeters and inches.

"Who am I?"

What do people answer when they are asked the question “Who am I?” Well, people ask a variety of different answers. Some are general and some are more in depth.  General answers are about where they grew up, and others were about how they were raised. How they were raised could include religion, background, and culture or cultures.  Some people wrote about how they came to the world, whether that means who their parents are or talking about religion. A few people said that they would answer with their likes and dislikes and what they are or are not. Examples may be liking to be outside, disliking animals, and if they are or are not a good speller. There are many things that people can like or dislike, and that topic can expand many ways since it is so vague. Some wrote in depth ideas such as is their way of thinking, and what has shaped them and how they manage their feelings. In depth gives way to seeing the small details of what defines them and their values of what is important or not so important. Goals were an answer as for education, careers, traveling, life, and family. Goals can also be tied into dreams, which is another way the question can be answered. Telling a story can also be a great way for answering who someone is. A story could show a real life experience of who a person is and their experiences. A person could tell a lot about who someone truely is based on a experience and how they handled it. Maybe they work good under pressure, or maybe they do not.  Overall the question of “Who am I?” can be answered in many different ways depending on ethnicity and background. Just like our class doesn’t have the same people, the answer to this simple question will never be the same either.